tg.stone of tears- 第214节

　
　‘It’s　not　that；　Pasha。　You’re　very　attractive。　It’s　just　that　。。。’
　
　She　unbuttoned　another　little　button。　Richard　reached　out　and　took　ahold　of　her　hand　to　stop　her。　He　realized　the　situation　was　being　hazardous。　She　was　his　teacher。　If　he　angered　or　humiliated　her；　things　could　bee　dangerously　plicated。　He　had　things　to　do；　and　couldn’t　afford　to　turn　her　antagonistic。
　
　She　pulled　her　dress　up　her　legs　and　put　his　hand　against　her　thigh。　‘You　like　this　better？’　she　asked　in　a　breathy　voice。
　
　Richard　froze　at　the　firm；　sensual　feel　of　her　flesh。　He　remembered　what　Sister　Verna　had　said；　that　he　would　soon　find　another　pair　of　pretty　legs。　These　were　certainly　that；　and　Pasha　was　leaving　precious　little　to　the　imagination。　He　pulled　his　hand　away。　‘Pasha；　you　don’t　understand。　I　think　you’re　a　beautiful　young　woman。　。。。’
　
　Her　eyes　fixed　on　his　face　as　she　ran　her　fingers　down　his　beard。　‘I　think　you’re　the　most　handsome　man　I’ve　ever　seen。’
　
　‘No；　you　don’t。　。。。’
　
　‘I　love　your　beard。　Don’t　ever　cut　it　off。　I　think　a　wizard　should　have　a　beard。’
　
　Richard　remembered　the　time　Zedd　had　used　Additive　Magic　to　grow　a　beard　and　teach　him　a　lesson；　and　then　had　shaved　it　off；　explaining　he　couldn’t　make　it　vanish　with　magic　because　that　would　take　Subtractive　Magic；　and　wizards　didn’t　have　Subtractive　Magic。　Subtractive　Magic　was　of　the　underworld。
　
　He　caught　her　wrist　and　pulled　her　hand　away　from　his　face。　To　Richard；　his　beard　was　a　symbol　of　his　captivity。　It　meant　he　was　a　prisoner。　Prisoners　don’t　shave；　that　was　what　he　had　told　Sister　Verna。　But　he　didn’t　think　now　was　the　time　to　explain　that　to　Pasha。
　
　She　kissed　his　neck。　Somehow；　he　was　unable　to　stop　her。　Her　lips　were　so　soft；　and　he　could　hear　her　insistent　breath　close　to　his　ear。　It　felt　as　if　the　kiss　went　all　the　way　through　him；　down　to　his　toes；　something　like　the　feeling　he　had　had　when　she　had　put　her　hands　to　his　Rada’Han。　The　tingling　numbed　his　brain。　Inside；　he　groaned。　His　resistance　was　being　dissolved　by　her　kisses。。。。
　
　When　he　had　been　held　in　a　collar　by　Denna；　he　had　had　no　choice　…　not　even　death　could　rescue　him　from　whatever　Denna　wanted　…　but　he　still　felt　shame　for　what　he　had　done。
　
　He　was　in　a　collar　again；　and　Pasha　was　using　some　sort　of　magic　on　him；　but　he　knew　that　this　time　he　had　a　choice　in　the　matter。　He　forced　himself　to　hunch　his　head　and　get　her　lips　from　him。　He　gently　pushed　her　back。
　
　‘Pasha；　please　。。。’
　
　She　straightened　a　little。　‘What’s　her　name；　this　girl　you　love？’
　
　Richard　didn’t　want　to　tell　her　Kahlan’s　name。　It　was　his　life。　It　was　private。　These　people　were　his　captors；　not　his　friends。　‘That’s　not　important。　That’s　not　the　issue。’
　
　‘What　does　she　have　that　I　don’t？　Is　she　prettier　than　me？’
　
　You　are　a　girl；　Richard　thought；　and　she　is　a　woman。　But　he　couldn’t　say　that。　You　are　a　pretty　candle；　he　thought；　and　Kahlan　is　the　sunrise。　But　he　couldn’t　say　that　either。
　
　If　he　spurned　Pasha；　he　would　have　war　on　his　hands。　He　had　to　get　out　of　this　without　making　her　feel　resentful　or　rejected。
　
　‘Pasha；　I　am　honored；　I’m　flattered；　I　really　am；　but　you　have　only　known　me　a　day。　We’ve　really　just　met。’
　
　‘Richard；　the　Creator　gives　us　urges；　and　pleasure　from　acting　on　them；　so　we　will　e　to　know　His　beauty　through　His　creation。　There　is　nothing　wrong　with　this。　It　is　a　beautiful　thing。’
　
　‘He　also　gave　us　a　mind　to　decide　what　is　right　and　what　is　wrong。’
　
　Her　chin　lifted　just　a　little。　‘Right；　and　wrong？　If　she　loved　you；　she　would　be　with　you；　she　wouldn’t　have　let　you　go。　That’s　what　is　wrong。　She　thinks　you　aren’t　good　enough　for　her。　She　must　wish　to　be　free　of　you；　if　she　cared　she　would　have　kept　you　with　her。　She’s　gone。　I’m　here　and　I　care。　I　would　fight　to　keep　you。　Did　she　fight？’
　
　Richard’s　mouth　opened；　but　no　words　came　through　the　hurt。　He　felt　as　if　his　will　to　go　on　had　drained　right　out　of　him；　leaving　nothing　but　a　hollow；　dead　shell。
　
　Pasha　reached　out　and　touched　his　cheek。　‘You’ll　see　that　I　care；　Richard。　I　care　more　than　she　does。　You’ll　see。　It’s　right　if　a　person　cares　as　I　do。’　Her　brow　creased　in　worry。　‘Unless　you　think　I’m　unattractive。　Is　that　it？　You’ve　seen　many　women；　and　you　think　that　in　parison；　I’m　ugly？’
　
　Richard　cupped　a　hand　to　the　side　of　her　face。　‘Pasha　。。。　you　are　ravishing。　It’s　not　that。’　He　swallowed　the　dryness；　trying　to　make　his　words　sound　sincere。　‘Pasha；　could　you　just　give　me　some　time？　It’s　simply　too　soon。　Can　you　understand？　Could　you　really　care　for　a　man　who　would　forget　his　feelings　so　easily？　Could　you　just　give　me　some　time？’
　
　She　wrapped　her　arms　around　him　and　laid　her　head　against　his　chest。　‘I　knew　yesterday；　when　you　held　me　so　tenderly；　that　it　was　another　sign　that　the　Creator　had　sent　you　to　me。　I　knew　then　that　I　would　never　want　another。　Since　I’ll　be　yours　forever；　I　can　wait。　We　have　almost　nothing　but　time。　We　have　all　the　time　you　could　possibly　want。　You’ll　see　that　I’m　the　one　for　you。　You　just　tell　me　when　you　are　ready；　and　I’ll　be　yours。’
　
　
　Richard　sighed　as　he　closed　the　door　behind　her。　He　leaned　his　back　against　the　door；　thinking。　He　didn’t　like　deceiving　Pasha；　letting　her　think　that　with　time　he　could　e　to　feel　differently　about　her；　but　he　had　had　to　do　something。　How　shallow　could　Pasha’s　understanding　of　people　be；　for　her　to　think　that　one　could　win　love　by　invoking　lust？
　
　He　took　out　the　lock　of　Kahlan’s　hair；　spinning　it　in　his　fingers　as　he　watched　it。　The　things　Pasha　had　said　about　Kahlan　not　fighting　for　him　made　him　angry。　Pasha　could　never　know　the　struggles　he　and　Kahlan　had　been　through；　the　hardships　they　had　had　to　overe；　the　anguish　they　had　suffered　together；　the　battles　they　had　fought　together。　Pasha　probably　couldn’t　conceive　of　a　woman　of　Kahlan’s　intelligence；　strength；　and　courage。
　
　Kahlan　had　indeed　fought　for　him。　She　had　more　than　once　selflessly　risked　her　life　for　him。　What　could　Pasha　know　of　the　terrors　Kahlan　had　bravely　faced；　and　conquered？　Pasha　wasn’t　woman　enough　to　serve　Kahlan　tea。
　
　He　stuffed　the　lock　of　hair　back　into　his　pocket。　He　forced　his　thoughts　of　Kahlan　from　his　mind。　He　couldn’t　endure　the　pain。　He　had　other　things　to　do。
　
　Going　into　the　bedroom；　he　positioned　the　ash…framed　standing　mirror；　and　then　retrieved　his　pack　from　the　corner。　Richard　pulled　out　the　black　mriswith　cape。　He　threw　it　around　his　shoulders；　and　stood　inspecting　his　image　in　the　mirror。
　
　It　looked　like　a　normal　cape。　He　thought　it　quite　handsome；　actually。　The　cut　and　length　was　right；　the　mriswith　had　been　about　his　size。　The　heavy　fabric　was　inky　black；　almost　as　black　as　a　night　stone　that　Adie　had　given　him　to　help　him　across　the　pass；　almost　as　black　as　the　boxes　of　Orden。　Almost　as　black　as　eternal　death。
　
　But　the　pleasing　cut　of　the　cape　was　not　what　intrigued　him。
　
　Richard　moved　back　against　the　light…brownish　wall。　He　pulled　the　hood　up；　cowling　it　around　his　face；　and　drew　the　cape　closed。　As　he　watched　his　image　in　the　mirror；　he　concentrated　on　the　wall　he　was　standing　against。　In　the　span　of　a　breath；　his　image　vanished。　The　cape　had　bee　the　color　of　the　wall　he　stood　against；　to　such　a　degree　that　only　if　he　stared；　focusing　on　the　edges　of　the　cape；　could　he　distinguish　himself　standing　against　the　wall。　If　he　moved；　it　was　only　slightly　easier　to　pick　out　his　shape　against　the　wall。　Though　his　face　was　exposed；　somehow　the　magic　of　the　cape；　or　possibly　the　cape’s　magic　along　with　his　own；　served　to　mask　it；　too；　to　enfold　it　somehow　into　the　concealing　color。
　
　This　explained　why　the　mriswith　appeared　to　be　different　colors。
　
　Richard　moved　objects　behind　himself；　to　discover　what　effect　they　had。　He　stood　in　front　of　the　wall　and　partly　in　front　of　a　chair　with　his　red　coat　draped　over　it。　The　cape　produced　a　blotch　of　red　that　did　a　good　job　of　mimicking　the　color　and　shape　behind。　Though　it　wasn’t　as　flawless　as　when　he　stood　before　a　plain　wall；　it　would　still　be　easy　to　miss　him　if　he　stood　still。
　
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