l pill pillars capped with ornate capitals； rose up to support the archive of a plex entablature。 Just like I had been taught in Architecture 1。 To either side tall windows opened onto wide balconies。 And all of this done in red brick。
〃Looks great so far；〃 Floyd said。
〃Yes； great；〃 I agreed。 But I looked back to make sure the porters with our packs were right behind us。 And I still had the concussion grenades in my pocket。 No one ever got into trouble by being prepared…as we used to say in the Boy Sprouts。
Down a brick corridor over brick paving we went。 Through a brick doorway into a great and impressive room。 It was colorfully lit by the sunlight that streamed through the ceiling…high； stained…glass windows。 Colorful scenes were depicted there of armies marching； attacking； fighting； dying； the usual thing。 This motif was carried through to the walls which were hung with tattered battle banners； shields and swords。 Robed men who stood about the room turned and nodded to us as we entered。 But our guide led us past them to the far wall where there was an elevated throne； made of you…know…what； on which was seated the tallest man I have ever seen。
Not only tall…but naked。
At least he would have been naked if he had not been pletely covered with rusty； reddish hair。 His beard cascaded down his chest…which was covered as well with hair。 Arms and legs and； I couldn't help peeking when he stood； hair all down his belly and crotch as well。 This was all that was visible since he was wearing a sort of jockstrap or sporran woven out of； well possibly； his own hair。 All of it the color of rusty iron。 I stepped forward and。 bowed a little bow。
〃Iron John 。 。 。 ？〃
〃None other；〃 he rumbled in a voice like distant thunder。 〃Wele Jim…and Floyd and Steengo。 Wele Stainless Steel Rats。 Your fame has gone before you。〃
Always good to meet a true fan。 We all bowed now since this was not the kind of reception you normally get。 Bowed yet again as all in the room cheered lustily。
Iron John sat down again and crossed his legs。 He either painted his toenails or they were naturally rusty。 I let it pass since there were a lot more things I would like to know first。
〃All here in Paradise were possessed of a great depression when you were arrested；〃 he said。 〃Falsely of course？〃
〃Of course！〃
〃I thought so。 But the galaxy's loss is our gain。 We are pleased since we now have； you might say； a monopoly on your talents。〃
This had an ominous sound which I ignored for the moment； cocking an ear as he rumbled on。
〃The galaxy is so filled with guilt； sorrow and wrongheadedness that we chose； out of disgust； not to watch most of what is disseminated by television。 I am sure that it will cheer you to know that； since your arrest and incarceration； we have canceled normal programming and have been running recordings of your numbers； day and night。 Now； soon； we will be happily blessed with the originals themselves！〃
This was greeted by cries of enthusiasm and we replied with nods； grins and handshakes over our heads。 When the shouts had died away old Rusty boomed out what they all wanted to hear。
〃It is our hope that you will now … play for us！〃 More shouts。 〃What a pleasure to hear live our favorite favorite ‘Nothing's Too Bad For the Enemy。' But while you are setting up we will broadcast a recording to warm up our nation…wide audience； to prepare them for your first live performance。〃
Which was not a bad idea since； although we could get going fast； their TV technicians were another thing altogether； Very much on the antique side。 They dragged in arm…thick Cables； antique…looking； homemade cameras and lights and other gear that belonged in a museum。 While this was happening a screen dropped down from the ceiling and lit up with lively color when the back projector came on。
The recorded program did not have what might be called the galaxy's most inspiring opening。 About a thousand suntanned bodybuilders drove heavy stakes into the ground with sledgehammers； backed by the thud of a beating drum。 The drum died away but the hammers kept hammering silently as the voice…over spoke。
〃Gentlemen of Paradise…we now bring you the special occasion that was announced a few minutes ago。 I know that all of you； right across the land； are riveted to your sets。 I think that we are going to get a hundred…percent rating on this one！ So while The Stainless Steel Rats are warming up for their first ever live performance here； we are privileged to play for you their special version of…‘The Spaceship Way'！〃
And it really was special。 We watched ourselves attacking the song with our usual gusto； listened once again to those lovely lyrics 。 。 。
Working on the engines； in the engine room；
Wirin' and firm' an' waitin' for the boom。
When the cannons blast like the sound of doom；
You know you're a…sweatin' in the engine room。
Captain on the bridge his fingers on the triggers
All the guns loaded by the spaceship riggers。
Swoopin' on the enemy； million miles an hour
Callin' to the engine room for power； power； power。
Power； Power； Power make the electrons whirl；
Power； Power； Power…hear them protons swirl！
Power； Power； Power will win the day
Power； Power； Power； that's the SPACESHIP WAY。'
We nodded and smiled with fixed grins。 Good…quality picture； good sound as well。 The audience was looking at the screen instead of at us for the moment。 Floyd looked at me； then raised his extended index finger to the side of his head and rotated it in a quick little circle。 The universal hand signal for insanity。 I nodded glum agreement。 I couldn't understand it either。
There we were on the screen playing on a familiar set； wearing our regular concert costumes。 Only one thing was wrong。
Until this moment none of us had ever seen the tenor who was right there with us； singing the song。
Tenor？
It had always been sung in sensuous contralto by Madonette。
CHAPTER 14
After the TV intro we played our number； pretty mechanically I must say。 Not that our audience noticed； they were too carried away simply by being in the Presence。 They swayed and waved their hands in the air and fought to keep silent。 But when Iron John joined us in the 〃Power〃 chorus they cheered and howled and sang right along with him。 When the last power had been overpowered they broke into lusty shouted applause that went on for a long； long time。 Iron John smiled beneficently at this and finally stopped it with a raised russet finger。 There was instant silence。
〃I join you in your enthusiasm for our honored guests。 But we must give them time to rest after their strenuous day。 We will surely hear them sing for us again。 You must remember they are with us now forever。 It is their rare privilege to be admitted to Paradise as full citizens； to live until the end of time in our fair land。〃
More cries of masculine joy。 We concealed our overwhelming pleasure at this life sentence and kept our silence as we packed up our instruments and handed them to the waiting servants。 Our audience moved out； still throbbing slightly with musical passion。
〃A moment please；〃 Iron John said； waiting for the others to leave。 When we were alone he touched a button at his side and the tall doors swung silently closed。 〃A fine song。 We all enjoyed it。〃
〃The Stainless Steel Rats aim only to please；〃 I said。
〃Wonderful。〃 His smile vanished and he stared at us grimly。 〃There is one more thing you must do to please me。 Your stay here will be a long one and we want you to be happy。 You will make us all happy； yourselves included； if you show a certain selection in topics of conversation。〃
〃What do you mean？〃 I asked…although I had a good notion of what he was leading up to。
〃We are very satisfied here。 Adjusted and secure。 I do not wish to see that security threatened。 You gentlemen e to our land from a very troubled outside world。 The galaxy is at peace…or so you say。 While ignoring the eternal war without end。 The conflict of duality that we are free of here。 You are the products of a society that is ego destroying instead of being ego building。 You suffer from the negativity that blights lives； weakens cultures； sickens even the strongest。 Do you know