p the shadow to ourselves and hug it tightly； gleefully； nursing it as we would a child。
〃We brought the shadow with us。 Perhaps no living； reasoning thing can be without such shadow； but we Zida'ya…despite our lives； beside which the spans of mortals are like fireflies…still we cannot ignore that shadow that is death。 We cannot ignore the knowledge of Unbeing。 Instead； we carry it with us like a brooding secret。
〃The mortals must die； and they are frightened by that。 We who were once of the Garden must also die； although our span is vastly greater； but we each embrace our death from the moment we first open our eyes； making it an insoluble part of us。 We yearn for its plete embrace； even as the centuries roll bv； while around us the death…fearing mortals breed and drop like mice。 We make our death the core of our being； our private and innermost friend； letting life spin past as we enjoy Unbeing's grave pany。
〃We would not give Ruyan Ve's children the secret of our near…immortality； though they were stock of the same tree。 We denied eternal life to Ruyan's folk； the Tmukeda'ya； even as we clasped Death tighter and tighter to our own bosoms。 We are haunted； my children。 The mortal word is the only correct one。 We are haunted。〃
He did not understand most of what First Grandmother said but Amerasu's voice worked on Simon like the scolding of a loving parent。 He felt small and unimportant； but reassured that the voice was there and that it spoke to him。 The Sithi around him maintained their careful impassivity。
〃Then the ship…men came；〃 Amerasu said； her voice deepening； 〃and were not content to live and die within the walls of Osten Ard as the mortal mice before them had been。 They were not satisfied with the morsels we tossed to them。 We Zida'ya could have stopped their depredations before they became great； but instead we grieved over the loss of beauty while secretly rejoicing。 Our death was ing…a glorious and final ending that would make the shadows real。 My husband Iyu'unigato was one such。 His gentle； poetic heart loved death more than it ever loved his wife or the sons of his loins。〃
For the first time a quiet whisper began to travel through the assembly； an uneasy murmur scarcely louder than the rustle of the butterflies overhead。 Amerasu smiled sadly。
〃It is hard to hear such things；〃 she said； 〃but this is a time when truth must be spoken。 Of all the Zida'ya； only one truly did not yearn for quiet oblivion。 He was my son Ineluki； and he burned。 I do not mean the manner of his dying…that may be seen as a cruel irony； or as a fated inevitability。 No； Ineluki burned with life； and his light dispelled the shadows…at least some of them。
〃All know what happened。 All know that Ineluki slew his gentle father； that he was then unmade at the last； bringing Asu'a to destruction as he struggled to save himself and all his folk from oblivion。 But his fires were so fierce that he could not go peacefully into the shadows beyond life。 I curse him for what he did to my husband and his people and himself； but my mother's heart is still proud。 By the Ships that brought us； he burned then and he bums still！ Ineluki will not die！〃
Amerasu lifted a hand as a fresh spatter of whispering rolled through the Yasira。 〃Peace children； peace！〃 she cried； 〃First Grandmother has not herself embraced that shadow。 I do not praise him for what he is now； only for the fierce spirit that no other showed； when such a spirit was the only thing that could save us from ourselves。 And he did save us； for his resistance and even his madness gave others the will to flee here； to the house of our exile。〃 She lowered her hand。 〃No； my son embraced hatred。 It kept him from dying a true death； but it was a flame even hotter than his own； and it has consumed him。 There is nothing left of the bright blaze that was my son。〃 Her eyes were hooded 〃Almost nothing。〃
When she did not speak for a while； Shima'onari rose as if to go to her； saying something quietly in the Sithi tongue。 Amerasu shook her head。 〃No； grandson； let me speak。〃 A touch of anger entered her voice。 〃This is all I have left； but if I am not heard； a darkness will descend that will be unlike the loving death which we sing to in our dreams。 It will be worse than the Unbeing that drove us out of our Garden beyond the sea。〃
Shima'onari； looking curiously shaken； sat down beside stone…eyed Likimeya。
〃Ineluki has changed；〃 Amerasu resumed。 〃He has bee something the world has not seen before； a smoldering ember of despair and hatred； surviving only to redress those things which long ago were injustices and mistakes and tragic underestimations； but now are simply facts。 Like ourselves； Ineluki dwells in the realm of what was。 But unlike his living kin； Ineluki is not content to wallow in memories of the past。 He lives； or exists…here is a place the mortal language is too inexact…to see the present state of the world obliterated and the injustices made right； but his only window is anger。 His justice will be cruel； his methods even more horrible。〃
She moved to stand beside the object on the stone pedestal； letting her slim fingers rest gently on the disk's rim。 Simon feared that she would cut herself； and felt an abnormal horror at the idea of seeing blood on Amerasu's thin； golden skin。
〃I have long known that Ineluki had returned； as have all of you。 Unlike some； though； I have not pushed it from my mind； or rolled it over and over in my thoughts only to enjoy the pain of it； as one prods a bruise or sore spot。 I have wondered； I have thought； and I have spoken with those few who could help me； trying to understand what might be growing in the shadows of my son's mind。 The last of those who brought me knowledge was the mortal boy Seoman…although he did not realize； and still does not； half of what I gleaned from him。〃
Simon again felt eyes upon him； but his own were helplessly fixed to Amerasu's luminous face； framed in the great white cloud of her hair。
〃That is just as well；〃 she said。 〃The manchild has been fate…battered and chance…led in many curious ways； but he is no spell…wielder or great hero。 He has fulfilled his responsibilities admirably； but needs no more heaped upon his young shoulders。 But what I learned from him has； I think； taught me the true shape of Ineluki's plan。〃 She took a deep breath； summoning strength。 〃It is terrible。 I could tell you； but words may not suffice。 I am the eldest of this tribe； I am Amerasu the Ship…Born。 Still there would be some who would secretly doubt； and others who would continue to turn their faces away。 Many of you would prefer to live with the beauty of imagined shadows instead of the ugly blackness at the core of this shadow…of the shadow that my son spreads over us all。
〃So I will show you what I have seen； then you will see； too。 If we can still turn our heads away； my children； at least we cannot continue to pretend。 We may keep out the winter for a while； but at last it will engulf us； too。〃 Her voice suddenly rose； plaintive but powerful。 〃If we are running joyfully into the arms of death； let us at least admit that is what we do！ Let us for this once see ourselves plainly； even at the ending of things。〃
Amerasu let her gaze drop； as though great weariness or sorrow had overtaken her。 There was a moment of silence； then just as a few quiet conversations had begun； she lifted her face to them once more and placed her hand on the pale moon…disk。
〃This is the Mist Lamp； brought by my mother Senditu out of Tumet'ai as the creeping hoarfrost swallowed that city。 As with the scales of the Greater Worm； as with the Speakfire； the singing Shard； and the Pool in great Asu'a； it is a door to the Road of Dreams。 It has shown me many things。 Now it is time to share those visions。〃
Amerasu reached down； lightly touching the bowl before the stone disk。 A blue…white flame sprang up and hovered wickless above the bowl's pale rim。 The disk began to gleam with a secretive light。 Then； even as it grew brighter； the entire chamber of the Yasira started to darken； until it seemed to Simon that the afternoon had truly withered away and the moon had fallen from the sky to hang ther