…G。 A。 CUSTER
〃Cushy job； he said！ Chance to practice； he said！ Piece of cake； he said！〃
〃Simmer down； kid！〃 Aahz growled。
〃Simmer down？ Aahz； weren't you listening？ I'm supposed to stop an army！ Me！〃
〃It could be worse；〃 Aahz insisted。
〃How？〃 I asked bluntly。
〃You could be doing it without me；〃 he replied。 〃Think about it。〃
I did； and cooled down immediately。 Even though my association with Aahz seemed to land me in an inordinate amount of trouble； he had also been unfailing in his ability to get me out 。 。 。 so far。 The last thing I wanted to do was drive him away just when I needed him the most。
〃What am I going to do； Aahz？〃 I moaned。
〃Since you ask〃…Aahz smiled…〃my …advice would be to not panic until we get the whole story。
Remember； there are armies and there are armies。 For all we know； this one might be weak enough for us to beat fair and square。〃
〃And if it isn't？〃 I asked skeptically。
〃We'll burn that bridge when we e to it；〃 Aahz sighed。 〃First； let's hear what old Badaxe has to say。〃
Not being able to think of anything to say in reply to that； I didn't。 Instead； I kept pace with my mentor in gloomy silence as we followed the chancellor's directions through the corridors of the palace。
It would have been easier to accept the offered guide to lead us to our destination； but I had been more than a little eager to speak with Aahz privately。 Consequently； we had left Buttercup and Gleep in the courtyard with our equipment and were seeking out the general's chambers on our own。
The palace was honeybed with corridors to the point where I wondered if there weren't more corridors than rooms。 Our trek was made even more difficult by the light； or lack thereof。 Though there were numerous mountings for torches set in the walls； it seemed only about one out of every four was being used； and the light shed by those torches was less than adequate for accurate navigation of the labyrinth。
I mented on this to Aahz as further proof of the tightfisted nature of the kingdom。 His curt response was that the more money they saved on overhead and maintenance； the more they would have to splurge on luxuries 。 。 。 like us。
He was doggedly trying to explain the concept of an 〃energy crisis〃 to me； when we rounded a corner and sighted the general's quarters。
They were fairly easy to distinguish； since this was the only door we had encountered which was bracketed by a pair of snatching honor guards。 Their polished armor gleamed from broad shoulders as they observed our approach through narrowed eyes。
〃Are these the quarters of General Badaxe？〃 I inquired politely。
〃Are you the magician called Skeeve？〃 the guard challenged back。
〃The kid asked you a question； soldier！〃 Aahz interceded。 〃Now are you going to answer or are you so dumb you don't know what's on the other side of the door you're guarding？〃
The guard flushed bright red； and I noticed his partner's knuckles whitening on the pike he was gripping。 It occurred to me that now that I had landed the magician's job； it might not be the wisest course to continue antagonizing the military。
〃Um； Aahz 。 。 。〃 I murmured。
〃Yes！ These are the quarters of General Badaxe 。 。 。 sir！〃 the guard barked suddenly。
Apparently the mention of my colleague's name had confirmed my identity； though I wondered how many strangers could be wandering the halls acpanied by large scaly demons。 The final； painful； 〃sir〃 was a tribute to my performance in the courtyard。 Apparently the guards had been instructed to be polite； at least to me； no matter how much it hurt 。 。 。 which it obviously did。
〃Thank you； guard；〃 I said loftily； and hammered on the door with my fist。
〃Further；〃 the guard observed； 〃the general left word that you were to go right in。〃
The fact that he had withheld that bit of information until after I had knocked indicated that the guards hadn't pletely abandoned their low regard for magicians。 They were simply finding more subtle ways of being annoying。
I realized Aahz was getting ready to start a new round with the guard； so I hastily opened the door and entered； forcing him to follow。
The general was standing at the window； silhouetted by the light streaming in from outside。 As we entered he turned to face us。
〃Ah！ e in； gentlemen；〃 he boomed in a mellow tone。 〃I've been expecting you。 Do make yourselves fortable。 Help yourselves to the wine if you wish。〃
I found his sudden display of friendliness even more disquieting than his earlier show of hostility。 Aahz； however； took it all in stride； immediately taking up the indicated jug of wine。 For a moment I thought he was going to pour a bit of it into one of the goblets which shared the tray with the jug and pass it to me。 Instead； he took a deep drink directly from the jug and kept it； licking his lips in appreciation。 In the midst of the chaos my life had suddenly bee； it was nice to know some things remained constant。
The general frowned at the display for a moment； then forced his features back into the jovial expression he had first greeted us with。
〃Before we begin the briefing；〃 he smiled； 〃I must apologize for my rude behavior during the interview。 Grimble and I have 。 。 。 differed in our opinions on the existing situation； and I'm afraid I took it out on you。 For that I extend my regrets。 Ordinarily； I would have nothing against magicians as a group； or you specifically。 〃
〃Whoa！ Back up a minute； General；〃 Aahz interrupted。 〃How does your feud with the chancellor involve us？〃
The general's eyes glittered with a fierceness that belied the gentility of his oration。
〃It's an extension of our old argument concerning allocation of funds；〃 he said。 〃When news reached us of the approaching force； my advice to the king was to immediately strengthen our own army that we might adequately perform our sworn duty of defending the realm。〃
〃Sounds like good advice to me；〃 I interjected； hoping to improve my status with the general by agreeing with him。
Badaxe responded by fixing me with a hard glare。
〃Strange that you should say that； magician；〃 he observed stonily。 〃Grimble's advice was to invest the money elsewhere than in the army； specifically in a magician。〃
It suddenly became clear why we had been received by the guards and the general with something less than open…armed camaraderie。 Not only were they getting us instead of reinforcements； our presence was a slap at their abilities。
〃Okay； General；〃 Aahz acknowledged。 〃All that's water under the drawbridge。 What are we up against？〃
The general glanced back and forth between me and Aahz； apparently surprised that I was allowing my apprentice to take the lead in the briefing。 When I failed to rebuke Aahz for his forwardness； the general shrugged and moved to a piece of parchment hanging on the wall。
〃I believe the situation is shown clearly by this…〃 he began。
〃What's that？〃 Aahz interrupted。
The general started to respond sharply； then caught himself。 〃This；〃 he said evenly； 〃is a map of the kingdom you are supposed to defend。 It's called Possiltum。〃
〃Yes； of course；〃 I nodded。 〃Continue。〃
〃This line here to the north of our border represents the advancing army you are to deal with。〃
〃Too bad you couldn't get it to scale；〃 Aahz mented。 〃The way you have it there； the enemy's front is longer than your border。〃
The general bared his teeth。
〃The drawing is to scale；〃 he said pointedly。 〃Perhaps now you will realize the magnitude of the task before you。〃
My mind balked at accepting his statement。
〃Really； General；〃 I chided。 〃Surely you're overstating the case。 There aren't enough fighting men in any kingdom to form a front that long。〃
〃Magician；〃 the general's voice was menacing； 〃I did not reach my current rank by overstating military situations。 The army you are facing is one of the mightiest forces the world has ever seen。 It is the striking arm of a rapidly growing empire situated far to the north。 They have been advancing for three years now； absorbing smaller kingdoms and crushing any resistance offered。 All able…bodied men of conquered lands are conscripted for military service； swelling their ranks to the size you see indicated on the ma